In the more classy parts of America, places like Arkansas and Iowa, people hunt for sport. Whitetail deer, pheasant, duck-billed platypus – whatever. Avid hunters say the attraction comes from the chase. Tracking a defenseless beast, lining it up in your crosshairs, pulling the trigger and ultimately hanging its carcass over the mantle as a trophy to scare the bejesus out of children and PETA members.
Sounds fun, doesn’t it? I’ve never been so I can’t say for certain. But I once dated a girl whose father made me watch his hunting home videos before I took her out. I was never sure if that was a passive aggressive threat or his way of bonding with me. Either way, it left an impression. And that impression was to wear a bullet proof vest the day I broke up with her.
In San Francisco the game of choice is an apartment. This city is overrun with places to live – most of them uninhabitable. Just ask the hundreds of homeless people shuffling around the Tenderloin area. Actually, don’t – it only encourages them to talk to themselves.
The biggest obstacle we’ve run into, other than Lisa not being here to help, is the competition. Desirable units get leased in a matter of nanoseconds. As you read this, an apartment is being placed on the market…and it was just now leased. If you’re even lucky enough to get in touch with someone to schedule a viewing, be ready to write a check on the spot. Also be prepared to Indian Leg Wrestle another applicant for the unit.
Never mind the fact that it’s a 600 sq. ft. studio going for $1800 a month. The landlord holds all the power – like the first girl to develop breasts in middle school. I didn’t have much luck with her either. And lets not forget I’m a decent-looking guy in San Francisco. If Lisa had been here first, I can only imagine how much more difficult it would be.
But the good news is I have an appointment Saturday afternoon to view several places. One of them is located in Nob Hill - a beautiful area at one of the highest points of the city. It’s within walking distance of almost everything – even Asia SF (More on that mind-boggling establishment at a later date).
So wish Lisa and myself luck, Durrty-Thinkers - that’s what I’m calling everyone who reads this blog (Just embrace it). We’re going to need all the help we can get. Hopefully, we’ll have a place to call home very soon.
And for my friend, Nate, here’s a map of where I work (point A) and where I’m currently staying (point B). Enjoy!
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